The world continues to evolve and awaken.
This pathless path I walk is so funny!
I experience more immense joy and satisfaction the more 'mundane' my life becomes. It is enough to have a daily rhythm, to have a place to go and serve others. Enough to experience moments of nourishment or creativity or radiance. Enough to have a companion by my side who wants me to feel supported and listened to and to laugh and grow with me.
Enough to walk into school in the morning and feel the reverberation of the janitors' work from the night before (for some reason this especially really gets to me--I feel so much great care from it). Something sacred about it that I don't quite understand but feels palpable. Just to feel all the smiles, to receive love from the students. But more than that, to experience the friction. The student who thinks, "You don't know me," while I think the same. The discord carries such a fascination with it that I am wholeheartedly curious and grateful, not resistant.
This space harbors no judgements. Every surface shimmers. Time is available to be played with, to be patient with, to be stretched and hung different places. I paint with time. I am availability itself. People are love and I am here to see them as love.
To forget astrology. To forget 'the one'. The one job, the one perfect spouse, the one saving grace. To forget all of it and experience the immense joy that is just this!
And then, there is the community of 'spiritual' peers, the new age ones who want me to want more. To be truly of the new age, they implore me to think big, to dream big, to manifest my reality and to only take lovers whose worth matches the undying glory of my soul (whatever that means).
To expect that I could have a more ecstatic existence seems like too much pressure...or am I just lazy?
Nothing to prove, no one to be.
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